A-List!

What a 10 days it has been at Upper 10 Towers! A full-on festive frenzy of the World's most famous people. Our Doors have resembled
portals to a Hollywood world of glitz and Glamour. Not just any old B grade,
tabloid fodder celebs either but high grade stars with whom you'd be happy to be
seen in St Tropez or at any of the Costas (del Sol, Brava or Bridlington).

Step aside George (news at 6) Alighia, Richard (twice nightly) Whitely, Alastair (Fame Academy) Griffin, and that woman who played one of the Mums on Holyoaks- you are no longer Upper 10's most famous....

First there was Mika, aptly enough Dominic was on duty, and for a few minutes it wasn't
clear who was the most effeminately dressed and styled man in HQ. I think Dom' s slip
on the Crown was loosened for a few minutes. In Dom' s own words, "Mika is taller and more masculine than you would think, and very handsome." There was a moment when Dom was uncertain whether it was actually the Chart topping frizz merchant stood before him, when he noticed one of his friends/entourage was wearing an outsized fleece helpfully emblazoned "MIKA".
He was due to play Doncaster and Newcastle in the days following his detour to York, but I noticed he had to call off some gigs soon after with a sore throat (imagine those high falsetto notes with a scratchy larynx). Funny Dom had a sore throat around the time of his visit too, sensibly he's been protecting it with his lovely fine, PINK  merino scarf ever since.

Second came Harold Bishop, aptly enough I was on duty, and for a few minutes it wasn't clear who was tipping the scales at the top weight in HQ. I think the crown stayed firmly put on my own oversized cranium as in my own words, "Harold isn't as tall or fat as you might expect, he's just got those lovely, wobbly jowells we all love to see shaking in the sunshine on Ramsay St." He is currently rehearsing for his 
upcoming role in Cinderella at York Theatre Royal, and will hopefully re-visit before the end of the run and purchase the bag that i was too star-struck to sell him!

6 Feet of Upper 10

Hello retail afficionados, El Sluge here, fresh from 3 days of 'Raw Retailing' in Lincolnshire. It's pure and primitive, 6 feet of Upper 10, but boy is it effective. We do not choose a 6 foot pitch because it happens to be the EXACT length of one of the Co-Founders (before you all let out a 'he's not 6 foot' groan, I'm talking DE and not DT, and it is official - it's on my medical records), but because we can cause maximum destruction in a very tight spot (quite like Temujin, The Khan of the Sea of Green - also known as Genghis Khan).




I have been reading about this little Mongol and have decided that he is possibly one of the most mis represented men of all time. True, he did kill a great deal of people, but if I was a Mongol, living on the plains, having to suck blood from a horse to survive, I couldn't promise you that I wouldn't be forced to unleash my inner power. Also if Big Yeff had been slain by a rival clan from Stonegrave, betrayed by the Wolverhampton Wolves, then I think I would be pretty angry about it. I don't think I could have killed the Big Cat though, even if he was taking all the pasties.
Anyway, I digress.
Recently, the face of Upper 10 bacame engaged.
I am quite delighted about MJN's news, and obviously the recent law changes have made the whole thing a little easier for him and Jean-Paul. He is SO proud of his Scottish heritage.



Ok fans, I'm off to skin a Marmot.
Slug X





 

York's Voice of Reason

Hello blogfans. As you are a very widely dispersed group of people, you may or may not be avid listeners of BBC Radio York. You shoud be. If you tune in to the morning and lunchtime shows you would have a very good chance of hearing my dulcet tones and erudite opinions and comments. I have been a consistent and alarmingly regular contributor for some time now but don't like to boast, so haven't widely made it known. Until now....
As I'm in the shop most of the time I am an easy mark for the BBC's roving reporter. All he has to do is turn up, corner me behind the desk and thrust the mike under my nose, what follows is pure radio gold. So far I have held forth on subjects as diverse as customer service from high street banks, tourism in York, Cookery and the place of metrosexuality in today's society....
It is only recently that I have been roped into to take part in an "outside broadcast". As you can see I had to play air guitar in a band to mark the occasion of the "World Air Guitar" championships in Finland. As you can see I'm not quite up there with this guy in terms of enthusiasm, and after my harrowing experience in front of the masses in York the other day I don't think I'll be trying!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9r10UbGC6RI

Also see the link to the BBC York Website:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/northyorkshire/content/image_galleries/radio_york_rogues_gallery.shtml?5

-Right I'm off, I've got to go and give my tuppence worth on reality TV!

Time to admit defeat

When those of you who have been lucky enough to know me for most of my life conjure an image of me in your mind, who do you see?
Do you see the fresh faced youngster, delighted to have been selected for his primary schools Under 9 side a year early?(back right)


If you met me in Liverpool you may remember a different chap. A chap who loved living in Halls of residence, a man who honestly believed that Supper was served in the Hall Dining Room at 5pm, so that you could have a second feed at 9. The 3 years took their toll, and it was here that I met George Rippon:


George is hidden, 2nd in from the right on this image.
Losing my hair had never crossed my mind, I had a mane equal to that of the mighty Simba, however as I recall, my very first convsersation with George went along these lines:

DEM: "You're a big lad. Do you work out?"
GR: "A little. I used to have hair like yours. You're looking at the future."

Nothing to worry about. Just because he was bald didn't mean that he had some kind of special gift, enabling him to predict new members to the Brotherhood of Baldies.

Those of you who have come to know me lately perhaps didn't feel it appropriate to mention that I was falling prey to the combover.
 

And so George had been right 6 years ago.
Yesterday I did 2 things.
1) I acquired a new 'hair hero'


2) I cut my hair. Grade 3 all over.

Time to admit defeat.

So George and Igor, you can both stop sending me invitations to the Belgravia Clinic, and news cuttings about the latest medicines uncovered in the rain forest.

El Sluge
X

Celebdaq!

Those of you who dabble in the financial markets may also be aware of "Celebdaq" where punters can buy celebrities and watch their stock rise and fall depending on the number of column inches and photographic coverage that their choices attract. No doubt some of you have invested heavily in Dom and I at Upper 10 and will
have been rubbing your hands together with glee as your stocks soared this last week. Foget Lewis Hamilton's second win, Beckham's Spanish Championship and Beefy's Knighthood (I only read the sports pages- don't know what else has been happening) this week has been all about OK Magazine's....Er... I mean Yorkshire Living's Glossy photographic spread of Upper 10's finest!
Say Cheese...... Tuck in!

Car-Wars!

Blogfans! Damien here, this blog centres around my unfortunate brother and he should really be writing it,but he can't see past the constant stream of tears flowing down his (worryingly) hirsuite cheeks. No he's not crying because he can't get anywhere near my powerball record (an impressive 12,440) or because he is insanely jealous that another man was wearing a pink headband at football the other night. It is due entirely to the crushing run of bad luck that he and Upper 10 global corps have had to endure of late with regard to the company fleet.

As has already been reported on these pages, the Turbo blew up a few weeks ago at great expense and inconvenience to all concerned. This was duly replaced and the car put back on the road. Then within a week the cam-belt went. This apparently can lead to a car being written-off, so obviously concern all round as more inconvenience and possibly eye-watering expense seemed sure to ensue. Thankfully the local garage had a spare, matching engine lying around- ripe for cannibalisation. The car was saved, the cost was bearable- hoorah!
Within 24 hrs a puncture happened, and the jack broke mid-repair. The tyre was sorted and within another 48 hrs the Turbo had gone-AGAIN.

It was a reconditioned Turbo and under warranty, so was refunded and a replacement sent. An hour ago we got a call, they are out of stock- don't know when they'll next be in.

All very demoralising.

With some funny results however:

- We both had to go to a show loaded with stock in a tiny borrowed Corsa. We turned a few heads arriving at a country mansion, driving over their moat (yes moat) to park alongside all the spacious transit vans, with Framed pictures of Jonny Wilkinson poking out of the sunroof!

- Dom had to buy a foot-pump, for the flat tyre. So we were also able to use it for my bike tyres and our indoor football.

- Dom has now used all his free call-outs with the AA, so if he breaks down again he will have to push the car to a garage (hope I'm not with him when that happens).

- You can drive really really far on a full tank in a Corsa. So if th ecar stays off the road for 132 years and we drive the Corsa 3, 536 miles a week for the duration of that time, we'll actually save 54 quid on petrol!

Powerball

So the Big Cat turned 124 last week (27 in human years), but couldn't celebrate as he normally would. He would normally see in his birthday lifting his body weight on two dumbells, however after over exerting himself a few months ago he is off games, so spent it curled up on the sofa:



But in order to cheer him up and put a spring back in his step, I bought him a powerball.

If you do not know what a powerball is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0v05iaYZC0

I'm not going to go on about it, but will post our PBs on here soon.

Also, there has been some debate recently about quite what is the Biggest Cat in the Jungle. Is it the Tiger, the Lion, is it the Liger, but no it is definitely the powerball wielding BIG CAT.

Sluge XX


 

Turbalicious

So what do you do when you let your girlfriend drive your car, and the next time you see it the entire oil supply of the Largeuna are on the floor?
The answer is to descend into a major sulk, whilst grumbling that "I'm sure it isn't your fault (it is). It could have happened if I was driving (definitely not). It will probably be very inexpensive to fix (it wasn't). "

So we waited for the nice man from the AA to turn up, but as it happened the AA had subcontracted to a local garage, who in turn had asked his mate to deal with it as he was having difficulty with a Ewe who was lambing.

I don't work for the AA, nor do I work for a garage in Malton, nor I am I the chap in Malton's mate, but if I was and I turned up to a situation where all of the oil had leaked out of the car, I am confident that my first suggestion would NOT have been to refill the oil tank ("Oh, you're out of oil pal")(1. Not pals 2. He was standing in said oil).

So after watching the oil drain through my French Beauty he suggested turning the engine on.

This, my mechanic informed me, dragged oil through my Air Conditioning sytem and front radiator. Two areas that do not benfit from the presence of lubricant.

Anyhow car got towed (I never get bored of sitting in the cab of an HGV) and it was fixed over a week later.

My car now has a new Turbo.



 


I'm off to check my Lubricant,

Sluge

This piccy is reference to my great pal FCB. He knows. It's just so soft.


PS Just read High Fidelity

Top 5 Take That Songs
1) Never Forget
2) Back for Good
3) Patience
4) A Million Love songs
5) Pray

We tend not to get out of bed for less than five grand

So this week saw the lads at Upper 10 produce their best poses for some new images for our spanking new website www.upper10.co.uk,

It went something like this, pout and stare, look to the distance...

Lets just say that one member of the board was much more adept than other..

Ok, more blogging later,

Ciao

Sluge

Jonny Wilkinson

So Jonny is back. Which we at Upper 10 are pleased about for a number if reasons:

1) We are massive rugby fans and so nothing pleases us more than a fantastic sportsman returning to fitness and form.

2) Right up to Jonny's return to the fray at HQ against the Auld Enemy, something had been eating away at him, and now I believe at least this demon has been laid to rest. That demon of course was that he had actually witnessed the greatest ever performance at Twickers, made by no other than the Big Cat. That's right blogfans, Jonny and the Big Cat made their Twickenham debuts together, shoulder to shoulder back in 1990. And that day the BigCat had fire running through his veins - Jonny could only admire. As you can see in this picture whilst Big Cat is behind the action, a certain JW has been trail blazed by him and his Mane:

But now he has finally surpased that performance, and the Big Cat has been dethroned.

3) Commercially JW is a great asset to U10, the 6 photo sequence of him dropping the winning goal at RWC 2003 remains an U10 topseller and since the beginnning of this 6 nations campaign, they have been running out of the shop. Check it out http://www.upper10.co.uk/products/Jonny_Wilkinson_World_Cup_Winning_Drop_Goal_6_Sequence_.htm

Here is another team shot with BC and JW down on the bottom left:

Ok Blog fans, see you later

Big Cat Goes Green!!

So yesterday saw an historic event take place in York. Having handed back the Impreza (estate- with spoiler) after the show season, I decided it was time to review my transportation apparatus. The principal reason for this was that I wanted to reduce my carbon paw-print. Of late I have been using the "bendy bus" which is the most futuristc and frustrating vehicle in existence:

- You can't speak to the driver ( he sits in a sealed-off cab)

- You have to pay a machine with a touch-screen that doesn't work.

- You have to have the exact change ( which leads to random trips to the co-op to buy chewing gum (handy for the Sluge's hallitosis) to break a tenner).

So all things considered i decided to go-green and get a bike. Halfords sorted me out with a sporty little number, and I duly got the add-ons: lock, lights and helmet (large obviously). I then took the bike back to HQ and chained it to a post outside. 20 minutes later I watched a youth surreptitiously stop by for a quick inspection- I was on the phone trying to seal an appointment with a customer so didn't want to hang up and go outside. I didn't get the appointment which was disappointing- but not as disappointing as going outside to find my front light (£18.99-cheers) had been lifted. I was not happy.

After closing up it was time for my inaugral journey, as i left i could be heard commenting, "Its all very well using a bike but i don't think a short journey like this will impact my fitness.." 20 minutes later i arrived home; quads burning, sweat literally dripping from my nose, panting and with the sorest of posteriors conceivable. This last pain was a surprise as i am particularly well upholstered in this region.

The good news was i had half an hour to rest before going off to play football! I think i volunteered for my spell in goal earlier than usual as my legs gave out quicker than ever. Luckily my heavily put-upon quads held out long enough to see me net a beauty and make a great diving save (low to the right at full stretch)- Showing all of my natural feline agility!

Back in the saddle this morning- every bit as sore! The day i make the journey without breaking sweat is the day i know i'm getting fitter.

Watch this space for my next update and a cycling- related joke to boot!

Harvie and Hudson Shirts- World Exclusive!

Another Week at Upper 10 and another new line of products. We are very proud to announce that Upper 10 is now the only stockist in the world other than Harvie and Hudson themselves to be stocking Harvie and Hudson's fantastic quality shirts. After blazing the trail for some time now with our own Bespoke shirts we were able to use our growing reputation to good effect and secure this fabulous opportunity to bring a famous name and quality product to York!

In our Opening promotion we are offering :

1 Shirt £49.99

2 Shirts £85

3 Shirts £115

So the bottom line is- Get along to 16 High Petergate and snap up 3 today!

Kristoff our ex- apprentice came up immediately to check them out after an "Old boys Jogging match" at his old convent school. He was pleased with his performance even though all eight of the current under 14 girls team beat him.

Also hello to the Sheriff- we do extra long sleeves on the Harvie and Hudson. The Sheriff really adds credibility to the old saying about the "long arm of the law!"